Karma is opportunity not taken

Dear Mom,

This letter is really hard to write. But I need help.

The past three weeks have been incredible. About four weeks ago Jon received his official offer letter to be the Production Planner at Rocket Lab in Long Beach, CA. The previous few years we struggled to bring in regular income and were raising our kids in financial poverty. We have been on food stamps since the end of 2019. There used to be a terrible amount of shame I carried about being on welfare. I kept it a secret though. Now I am not ashamed because we needed the help and were courageous enough to ask for it.

Over the years we also exhausted every resource to help with our situation. Not just government resources, though. About a year ago or so our car got repossessed. That was our only vehicle and only source of income. I reached out to a few people about our situation. Somebody paid $6k plus fees to get us our car back. I still don’t know who they are and they wanted to be anonymous. This is something I will pay forward one day I cry every time I think about what happened. And again, I asked for help and help came.

We moved from WA to CA very quickly and on a shoestring budget. We sold enough staff that we had the gas money we needed and a little extra. We would go to a long term hotel stay and Jon would drive Uber and Lyft to pay for it until he started getting paid from RL. We knew thiswould be tricky, ballsy and scary as shit. But also we had to just run. Our family was notsucceeding so essentially we ran to California to start a new life. Sound familiar? I think a lot about our move from CA to ID.

On the drive down we stopped by or old Vallejo house. That was really fun to show the kids and point out where I threw co my going away Party when we moved. We also drive the Golden Gate Bridge. We tried to connect with Melanie but it didn’t work out. She might come visit me in November though!

Our road trip was three days and during a heat wave. Temps were over 100 every day. Our Uhaul blew a tire and that was stressful. Turns out we were given a trailer with a very bald tire. But that is a blip in comparison to what happened just 200 miles from our final destination.

I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.it was evening and the sun was starting to set when we heard a loud POP, liquid trickling out, and Jon saying something like, “ fuck, no, this can’t be happening.” we were in the fast lane on the 405 and polled over to the left shoulderjust in time. I would say it’s miraculous we weren’t hit. And as I relive this trauma to tell you, I’m crying. It was so scary. I am so, so grateful we are safe.

Jon’s stress has hospitalized him multiple times the past few years. He is severely depressed and has PTSD and anxiety he has never healed through. He started working with an EMDR therapist and while it’s hard work, we see positive results. But This therapy is now paused until he can find a new therapist covered by our insurance. I share this to help you understand a little about how much his mental health impacts our life. 

When we pulled over, Jon got out and started throwing up. I am used to it by now. My role in those moments were to shot down my fears and reassure the kids. I think I did a pretty good job at that, too. Son couldn’t see straight, so I started making suggestions on what we do next. To be honest though, my suggestions were more like orders. While son dialed 911, l frantically posted to Facebook.

This is when we started living out It’s A Wonderful Life.

And I’m going to cry while I write this.

A Pure Romance client, Sandra, immediately messaged me.

“What do you need?” she asked.

“I don’t know.” Then, “Probably a place to stay tonight.”

Sandra said ok and put like $125 in my Venmo.

I have never felt so humbled and grateful.

Sandra suggested I put it all out there on FB like or situation and my Venmo. 

So I did.

And the people showed up – all of them were past clients or strangers who happened to be following our story.

To say we are overwhelmed by the outpouring of support is a wild understatement.

For the next few days, every time we opened my Venmo, we saw more money and we cried. All these people together basically donated $2k to help us move forward instead of being homeless. And then an old Navy buddy of Jon’s offered to put us up at a Hilton hotel for 11 nights. Jon finally felt some emotion when I told him.

I have no idea what we would have done wo all that financial help. If there is one life lesson we have learned is that you need money to live a good and decent life. Hence our more for a fantastic job that will carry us through retirement.

Our 4Runner was one payment away from being paid off and she was only 7 years old. Losing this car is what truly fucked everything up. Once we got down to LB, we were considering selling it to put a down payment on a house. As of now, Glenn and Carolyn gave us their car. We might be selling it for $2k by Friday so we can get into our apartment.

Jon has now started working and absolutely loves his job. There is a very good career path for him. It’s a company that literally builds rockets and they send people to space! It makes me think about those rockets we launched as kids.

We have one last major hurdle to get through and it’s getting into our apartment on Friday. We found an awesome spot that is a 3-minute walk to a swim on the beach! I think this location, being so close to the ocean, will be really healing for my family. And we need that. We need healing for so many things. I need healing.

We basically have two options to get into our awesome apartment: sell our car or sell my ring. We took it to get appraised today and received some great advice on what to do. I can take my ring to a pawn shop and get like $150. If I take it to a jeweler I can get like $500. My hope is to sell it for $2k or $3k. The free market value of my ring is just under $3k. The insurance value is over $7k. 

So, selling my ring is not ideal. But I have thought about it a lot and shed tears too. It is my most prized possession. My favorite present ever. I love my ring so much forwhat it represents. It’s very special to me.at the end of the day its just a possession though. I look at selling the ring as how Jon continues to take care of our family through all this hardship and his own mental health. I am grateful.

After talking with the jeweler I decided selling it didn’t make sense. For one thing, one small diamond is missing. Who wants to buy an engagement ring that’s missing a diamond? This is when he suggested reaching out to family and friends for a loan with a fixed interest rate and using the ring as collateral. If I could find someone willing to help us out this week, we can easily move in, keep or car and buy back my ring.

That’s what this whole letter is about. I’m looking for someone to give me a loan. The jeweler we are working with suggests looking for a $3500 loan with a fixed interest rate of 18%.  If this is something you can help me with, I would be so very grateful.

This letter is not easy to write. But I need your help in this specific way. I am desperate. Selling our is doable, but it makes us nervous and we would like to avoid that at all costs. If there is anything I can do to convince you to give this loan, tell me. I am willing to give you whatever you. Just name your price.

I can tell you that after this letter, after we are safely in our awesome little apartment, I will not need to ask anyone for money again. Jon’s job pays $85k w stock options and his first raise should be in a few months. Plus I will be able to start working again which is very exciting.

Thank you for taking the time to read. If you can help us out, please let me know. Thanks.

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