As I sat back on the couch that had been part of my life forever, I flipped through a catalog of bedroom toys with my mom and about 15 other women from my church. It may sound kinky, but we were a pretty prudish group. Then again, my Pure Romance consultant handed me $75 in shopping credits at the end of the event, so perhaps these Christian women were a bit kinkier than I initially gave them credit for.
I filled my mom’s home with Christian women, so naturally, I heard comments like, “I have Brad, I don’t need this,” throughout the party. They were referring to a pink dual-action vibrator with beads in the shaft that swirled in circles to stimulate the walls of a woman’s vaginal canal.
I stayed quiet about my interest in these intriguing bedroom toys, allowing shame to wash over me like a cold blanket.
On the flipside, I enjoyed watching the women squirm as bedroom toys made their rounds. For instance, I watched my mom accept the pink vibrator from her neighbor, using just two fingers and an outstretched arm, as though the toy might bite her if it got too close.
A few hours later, I dragged Mr. Sexy by the hand to the makeshift shopping room, which doubled as my dad’s cluttered den. I directed him to sit in the only office chair, and I perched on his lap. As a Christian married woman, I didn’t make decisions alone, especially not intimate ones like these.
Up to that point, Mr. Sexy and I had never used bedroom toys, nor had we even talked about them.
However, Mr. Sexy didn’t show any resistance when I pointed out a few couple’s toys. While many other interesting bedroom toys circulated during the party, I didn’t think of those toys as something for me—or rather, for us.
Even though I knew what I wanted to purchase when we entered the shopping room, I made Mr. Sexy go through the entire catalog with me. I guess I wasn’t sure how he felt about using pleasure toys that seemed more focused on my pleasure than his.
At that moment, I didn’t yet know that Mr. Sexy understood from the beginning of our relationship that my pleasure meant even more pleasure for him.
After going through the catalog, I showed Mr. Sexy the “7th Heaven,” a vibrating c-ring. The name gave me a huge kick because I LOVED the CW show “7th Heaven.” My parents, however, made me stop watching it after a few seasons because of all the dating the kids did. Go figure.
This couple’s toy likely got its name not from the TV show, but from the seven speeds and settings it had. The price point and versatility of this bedroom toy made it a fantastic first choice for us.
This bedroom toy could be used in a few different ways. First, a metal bullet could easily slide in and out of the cone-shaped jelly sleeve. The sleeve also featured a ring that would easily slide onto a penis with the right lubricant.
In other words, this bedroom toy could be used for solo play or couples play.
To be honest, we mostly used this toy for penetration. And I gotta tell ya, the 7th Heaven got the job done! For the first time, I experienced regular orgasms without having to work as hard for them. We used that same vibrator for a few years until it broke, and then I bought another one because we liked it so much.
Eventually, we upgraded to cordless and rechargeable silicone. These days, though, we don’t use our vibrators during sex as much. It’s almost like the toys helped us explore, helped me loosen up, and discover pleasure points around my body.
Toys are still super fun to use, and we definitely still buy them. But now, we use them differently. Or, I guess you could say we use them for a wider range of purposes. As a result, we now have a plethora of sex toys scattered around our bedroom.
Because we were willing to experiment sexually, we learned new ways to connect with each other. So, when life got really hard, and words just couldn’t cut through the tension, we found each other through our bodies—often in the middle of the night because that’s when we both felt the most calm and at peace.
Sex can be devastating. Even painful.
But sex can also be healing and a wonderful way to connect with your partner and yourself.
So many times, Mr. Sexy and I have used sex to connect with each other when words failed us. The outcome for us: deeper intimacy.
So, in my opinion, buying that first vibrator saved our marriage. That vibrator was the first step towards understanding our sexuality individually and together.
I feel like there is so much more to be said on this topic.
What areas would you want to explore next?
You have observed very interesting points!
ps nice website.Raise your business